Scoop: Russell and Katy planning a naked wedding? 

Just because he’s settling down doesn’t mean Russell Brand is going to become any less outrageous. Asked about his wedding plans with fiancee Katy Perry, the cheeky British comedian told People magazine, “We are going to do the wedding naked! All the families will be naked!” (He was joking — we think. Katy’s parents are devout Christians, after all.)

Asked about his dream wedding, Russell was disturbingly literal.

“All my dream weddings don’t make sense,” he said. “The vicar will start melting. The people in the front row will turn into people from my school. And then everyone will only say the word ‘potato.’”

Uh ... we’re thinking this could be a Freudian sign that Russell hasn’t quite moved past his commitment anxiety. Katy, perhaps a little premarital couples counseling may be in order.

 

Tila adopting?

Tila Tequila evidently has never come across a situation she couldn’t exploit for publicity, whether it’s the death of her fiancee, Casey Johnson, or the suffering of an earthquake-stricken nation.

The reality TV star, who recently proclaimed herself pregnant via Twitter, now says she also wants to adopt a baby from Haiti — and Tila claims an official is helping her.

“Just got done talking 2 Ambassador!” the former Myspace phenom tweeted. “He’s gonna help me adopt a child from HAITI! I’m so blessed!”

Tila also claimed the unnamed ambassador told her she’s “truly one of God’s angel[s]!” and added, “And for the AMBASSADOR to say that to me, I am astounded! he knows the ‘REAL TILA’ not what u ppl know. So that is why he’s helping me!”

We find this very, very hard to believe — especially since Tila doesn’t identify “the ambassador.”

But we wouldn’t be surprised if a public official steps forward to deny her claims — just as rapper The Game, who she identified as her baby-daddy-to-be, has come forward to say he doesn’t even know Tila.

Like we said, this girl will exploit any situation for publicity.

 

Chace’s new model

“Gossip Girl” star Chace Underwood has a new love interest. The teen heartthrob (who’s actually 24) was reportedly snuggling up to model Jennifer Akerman (sister of actress Malin) at a recent Hollywood house party.

“They’ve known each other for a while, but now it looks like they’re dating,” a pal told In Touch magazine, adding, “Jennifer is adorable and exactly his type.”

So far, however, things haven’t become serious — so if you’re an 18-year-old girl reading this, dry those tears from your eyes!

 

Bickering Brangelina

A new wrinkle in the saga of the supposed Brangelina breakup: The British tabloid that originally reported the unmarried couple had met with “divorce” lawyers to plan a split now claims they’re arguing about whose camp leaked the story.

“Since the News of the World broke the news they have been at each other’s throats, blaming one another,” a source told — you guessed it — the News of the World. “Brad believes Angelina or her family leaked the story. Angelina denied this. She says she doesn’t want the breakup to play out in public.”

Yeah, good luck with that. After all, it’s been five years since Brad’s last breakup — and that one is still playing out in public.

Kitty Raymond is an entertainment writer and astrologer. She welcomes feedback at kitty@media-darling.com.

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