Jennifer Aniston puts all the wedding-off rumors to rest 

click to enlarge Jennifer Anniston | Justin Theroux
  • Jason Merritt/Getty Images
  • Jennifer Anniston told the Associated Press that it feels like her and Justin Theroux are already married anyway.

Jennifer Aniston and boyfriend Justin Theroux are being very selfish by repeatedly making us wait to find out if they are actually going to get married.

Thinking only of themselves, they have heretofore remained quiet about when, where and how they will wed, if at all. "We just want to do it when it's perfect, when it's not rushed," Aniston told The Associated Press, saying she wanted to clear up all the rumors that the couple had cold feet, postponed plans or had arguments about where to tie the knot.

"And, you know, we already feel married," she said.

It's a little too little, a little too late, Jen. The nation is broken and frankly we don't feel like we can trust you anymore. Sniff.

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Katy St. Clair

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